Sunday, July 30, 2006

Woodcutting O. Rackets 1962 – 2006

Woodcutting came from a family of tennis equipment makers in the highlands of Scotland. Obviously these were the days when the players’ tools were made from wood rather than metal, a technological advancement that hit the family hard and from which they never properly recovered.
They tried other avenues of wood production. An attempt to become an Ikea supplier failed despite the family rechristening themselves as Bergstrom and buying a Volvo in a misguided attempt to win the compatriot vote.
They then won the contract to manufacture the extra leg for Rolf Harris’ character Jake the Peg. This was cut short unfortunately due to a severe case of woodworm in one leg. The leg collapsed during a Royal Variety performance and Harris tumbled head first into Princess Anne’s lap.
Following this they retreated even further north in Scotland and built their own log cabin with their remaining stock. As it is with the Rackets family luck, the cabin collapsed when Woodcutting was home alone one day, killing him instantly.